Word
Count: 8,834
Rating:
PG13
Category:
AU. Crossover/Fusion. Angst. Friendship.
Story Status:
Complete
Summary:
Rodney starts to have problems with his senses.
Thanks:
Thank you to Jayne Perry for the beta-reading and to alyjude for the wonderful cover art.
Chapter One – Changing
Rodney had been working hard in the labs, trying to catch up after
weeks of enforced convalescence by Carson, after Sheppard had shot
him. And how weird did that still sound, that Sheppard had
shot
him?
He was only released to light duties, technically, and if Carson found
out he was working late into the night, there’d be hell to
pay. But right now, he wasn’t too worried about
that as he
really needed to get back on top of things. Radek had done a
good
job keeping the science staff in line and on track, not that he would
ever admit it to the Czech, and had kept him informed of any problems
or exciting discoveries. Which had been frustrating, not
being
involved in working on any new technology that turned up. Not
to
mention not being involved in solving problems, either. So he
was
glad to finally be back at work.
The door opened, and he looked up to see Radek in the doorway.
“You should not be here,” Zelenka said.
“If Carson finds out…”
“And he won’t, unless someone tells him,”
he frowned at Radek.
“Ah, perhaps I should, so as to keep on his good
side.”
Rodney sighed, returning to his laptop, rubbing his eyes as the screen
blurred briefly.
“You are tired, maybe make mistakes,” Radek
continued. “Mistakes I will have to
correct.”
“I don’t make mistakes,” Rodney snapped.
“Of course, I forgot. You are infallible.
Except when you are not.”
“Oh, for goodness sake, go away. I’m
fine,”
Rodney continued to read the latest report, stalling when the screen
seemed to magnify so that he could see each pixel.
“What
the…”
“Rodney?”
“Nothing, nothing,” Rodney said quickly, as the
screen returned to normal. “You still
here?”
“Yes, I am still here. I think I need to call
Carson.”
“No, you do not.”
“Then you will rest?”
“Radek…” Rodney glared at him, startled
when he
heard a loud thump-thump noise coming from Radek.
“What’s that noise?”
“What noise? I hear nothing.”
“That ‘thump-thump’ noise. You
sure you can’t hear it?”
“I hear nothing except tired physicist yapping,”
Radek
looked concerned. “Are you sure you are
okay?”
“Yes, yes,” Rodney scowled,
“it’s gone now
anyway.” Rodney returned his attention to the
laptop, but
felt unsettled. He heard Radek sigh.
“I will go,” the Czech said, “and return
with Carson.”
“No, damn it, you will not!” Rodney got up, but
stumbled
when the room seemed to refocus so that he could see everything up
close, as though he was looking through a microscope. Radek
moved
quickly, grabbing his arm and helping him to sit back down.
“Oh crap,” he put his head in his hands, closing
his eyes.
He heard Radek call Carson to his lab. Well, that was just
great,
he thought to himself. First day back at work, and he was at
least looking at a tongue lashing from the Scot, probably followed by
being taken off duty again. He risked opening his eyes and
looked
up. Okay, sight was back to normal. What on
Earth…well, Atlantis, had caused that? And what
was that
infernal noise coming from Radek again? The noise faded, but
that
smell…ack, too much deodorant or aftershave or
something.
The smell faded, but why was his shirt feeling scratchy all of a
sudden, it was fine not long ago. And now, damn it, his head
felt
like it was going to explode.
Time seemed to speed up, because the next thing he was truly aware of
was a Scottish voice trying to get his attention. He looked
up
into Carson’s worried, and annoyed, face.
“Carson.”
“At last, I’ve been trying to get a response form
you for a good couple of minutes now.”
“Oh. Sorry.”
“Sure you are. I let you back to work on light
duties, and you go and overdo it on your first day back!”
“I’m fine!”
“You’re not,” Carson glared at him.
“He was complaining about a noise, one I could not
hear,” Radek put in.
“Hmm, that doesn’t sound good. Any other
problems?”
Rodney glared at Radek, and then turned his glare onto
Carson.
Carson merely stood back, folding his arms over against his chest,
waiting. And then Rodney’s eyes focused in, so that
he
could see the individual fibres that made up Carson’s
jacket. He closed his eyes, placing his throbbing head back
into
his hands with a groan.
“Rodney,” Carson sounded worried.
“What is
it?” When Rodney didn’t reply, he sighed
in
frustration. “Come on, there’s no point
in being
stubborn. There’s obviously something wrong, and
the fact
you’re not whining about it is, frankly, worrying in
itself.”
“I don’t whine…” Rodney heard
Carson’s
snort quite clearly, too clearly. “Much,”
he amended,
and sighed deeply. “It started with my eyes, it was
like I
could see each pixel on the laptop screen, and then later it was like I
was looking at the room through a microscope. Probably just
some
weird tiredness thing, right?”
“Maybe,” Carson said cautiously.
“What about the sound you thought you heard?”
“It was like a thump-thump sound, and it came from
Radek…” Rodney trailed off. “A
thump-thump sound,
like a heartbeat. Only that’s not
possible.”
“You heard Radek’s heartbeat?” Carson
asked in surprise.
“No, I mean, I don’t know. It sounded
like it,
okay? And my shirt started feeling scratchy for no reason,
and I
could smell someone’s aftershave or deodorant or something,
and
it was overpowering. But it only lasted a few moments each
time.”
“Bloody hell,” Carson said,
“that’s four out of
five senses you’ve mentioned, all of them temporarily
heightened.”
“Sentinel,” Radek breathed in astonishment, before
turning to Carson. “Is it possible?”
“Aye, lad, it’s possible. Not all
Sentinels have
their abilities appear during puberty. It can be delayed in
rare
cases into adulthood.”
“What? You think…” Rodney
stopped, stunned by
what Carson and Radek obviously thought. “You think
I could
be a Sentinel? Someone with five enhanced senses?”
“Aye, it does sound that way. We need to get you
down to the infirmary, do a few tests to find out.”
Rodney was too shocked by this possibility to put up any protest when
Carson guided him towards the infirmary. Unfortunately, he
had
only stepped out into the hallway when his sense of smell decided to
play up; he couldn’t breathe and started to gag. He
was
vaguely aware of Carson telling him to breathe slowly, but he
couldn’t, the air smelt so foul, and started to
hyperventilate,
until darkness took him.
----------------
When Rodney resurfaced, he was lying on an infirmary bed, with various
monitors attached to him. He groaned as his head reminded him
of
its aching status, and he closed his eyes against the light in the
room, moving one of his arms up to cover them.
“Hey, how you feeling, McKay?”
He recognised Sheppard’s voice.
“Hurts,” he whispered. “Need a
new head, one that doesn’t ache abominably.”
“Let me get Beckett. I’m sure he can give
you something to make that better.”
“That would be good.”
Sheppard moved off, and Rodney drifted. He wished someone
would
switch off the noisy monitors, they weren’t helping his head
any. He recognised the heart monitor, and felt his heart
beating
in time with it. Felt it, heard it, and then got lost in it.
------------
When Sheppard returned with Carson, Rodney was still, completely and
frighteningly still. Carson moved McKay’s arm from
over his
eyes, and placed it back down beside him. Rodney’s
eyes
were open and fixed, staring at nothing. Almost as if dead.
“Rodney,” Carson called, rubbing a hand over
McKay’s
arm. “Rodney, can you hear me? You need
to come back
now.”
“What’s happening, doc?” John
asked. “He
was complaining of a headache, but otherwise he seemed fine when I left
him.”
“It’s okay, he’s just fallen into a zone
out.
We just need to talk to him, encourage him to return.
Physical
contact helps as well.”
“A zone out?”
“Aye. It’s when a Sentinel focuses in on
one sense
too much, and loses himself in a kind of fugue state. It
happens
sometimes, especially with new Sentinels. Training will help
to
reduce the occurrence of them.” Carson reassured
him,
turning his attention back to Rodney. “Come on,
now.
Come on back to us, Rodney.”
John joined him in coaxing McKay back from wherever he had gone, taking
one of Rodney’s hands in his own, and rubbing it gently.
It took a good fifteen or so minutes before McKay responded, coming
awake with a start, and looking round wildly. John placed the
hand he was holding back onto the bed.
“Hey, there you are,” he said quietly.
“What…what happened? And, oh crap, my
head…” Rodney placed an arm back over his eyes
again.
“You had a zone out,” Carson said calmly.
“What do you remember last?”
“I…the heart monitor. I was listening to
it, and
could feel my heart beating in time with it. And then I could
hear my own heart…and then I woke up just now.”
“Well, it seems you zoned out on your own
heartbeat.
Concentrated on your hearing too much, got lost in it, for want of a
better explanation. You’ll get used to this, learn
how to
avoid them.”
“So…I am a Sentinel?” Sheppard
could hear the fear in McKay’s voice.
“Yes. I did some tests. We’re
able to recognise
the Sentinel/Guide gene after the person has, in essence, come
online. We can’t detect it prior to that as
yet.
Anyway, you now have the altered gene, so there can be no doubt about
it.”
“Oh.”
“Hey, I think it’s cool,” Sheppard said
with a
grin. “Just think how useful this will be on
missions. You’ll have hearing to rival
Ronon’s, in
fact, he might be jealous of you. And to be able to see
danger…”
“Yeah, I guess.” Rodney still looked
freaked out
though. “Of course, if I zone out on a mission,
I’d
be a liability.”
“So, we find a way to protect you from that,” John
nudged him. “Come on, think of the plus
side.”
“Not really in my nature, that, is it? You know, a
glass half empty type of guy.”
Sheppard shook his head in exasperation.
“Do I need a Guide?” McKay asked Carson.
“Because, I really don’t think I’m a good
candidate
for that.”
“Well, Sentinels don’t need
a Guide, that is, they can survive without one quite well.
But
with a Guide, the ability to control the senses is increased as is the
range and sensitivity of them. Zone outs are far less likely
with
a Guide than without, and a Guide can pull you out of one within one to
six minutes. It takes non-Guides between ten and forty
minutes to
do that.”
“In other words, I’ll manage okay without one, but
would manage a lot better with one?”
“Aye.”
“There aren’t any Guides on Atlantis. If
I remember
right, don’t they have to be compatible or
something? I
would have to go to Earth, take part in ‘mixers’,
you know,
get-togethers, to try and find my Guide,” Rodney scowled at
the
thought.
“Well, you might not. In fact, I think
there’s a good chance you won’t.”
“You think we can find a Guide here?” Sheppard
asked, confused.
“Most likely. With latent Sentinels, in ninety
percent of
cases a latent Guide lives within about two miles of said Sentinel, and
comes online within one to four weeks of the Sentinel doing
so.
It assumed that there is some instinctual knowledge that draws them
together before they come online. Often, about eighty percent
of
the time, the Sentinel and Guide already know each other, and are
usually friends. So there’s a very good chance that
someone
here will become a Guide within a month, and he or she will be
compatible with you.”
“Oh,” Rodney’s brow was furrowed as he
took this all
in. “But will they want to bond with me?
Even if I
wanted to bond with them, and I’m far from sure about
that.
I mean, this whole bonding thing…it
sounds…”
“There’s a lot of rubbish talked about
it,” Carson
said sternly. “It’s perfectly natural,
and completely
platonic. No bonded Sentinel and Guide have ever been more
than
very good friends. There is never any hint of sexual interest
or
tension between them, regardless of gender or sexual
orientation.
The bond causes them to be like siblings, very close siblings, but
nothing more.”
“Oh, well, that’s a relief. Though
I’m not sure
about that whole close family thing. It
seems…difficult.”
“Ach, lad, it’s probably no more close than your
team and
you are, and don’t tell me they’re not like family
to
you. You said as much when we went to Sateda after
Ronon,”
Carson said with a cheeky grin.
“Oh great! I knew I should have kept my mouth
shut!”
“You said that?” John said, with a teasing grin.
“Aww, that’s nice.”
“Oh, shut up.”
“Look, there’s little point in worrying yourself
about
it. The more important thing is to give you some training on
how
to control your enhanced senses,” Carson stated.
“I
have some information on that, and I believe Major Lorne has some
experience with it. He’s stood in for Dr Jackson a
few
times.”
“Of course! General O’Neill’s a Sentinel,
isn’t
he? And if I remember right, he and Jackson were both latent
until a few years ago,” John smiled.
“I’ll talk
to Lorne.”
“Oh, just wonderful. I’m sure
he’ll be
overjoyed when you ask him to help me out, just like I am,”
Rodney rolled his eyes, and then winced. “Damn,
this
headache’s not getting any better, Carson.”
“I know, but I’m going to have to be careful what I
give
you. Now that you’re a Sentinel, I need to check
you for
drug sensitivity, and for any new allergies.”
“Oh, great, another side benefit. More allergies,
just what I need!”
“You’ll be fine, Rodney,” Carson
sighed. Rodney narrowed his eyes, not feeling very reassured.
“Well, I’ll leave you to it. I need to
find Lorne and
give him the good news,” Sheppard said with a grin as he left.
“Now, let’s see how you respond to simple
Tylenol…”
Sheppard shook his head at the groan Carson’s comment
elicited
from McKay. He didn’t envy the doc his job right
now.
Nor did he envy his team-mate’s position that much either.
----------------
John decided to see Elizabeth before finding Lorne, and found her in
her office.
“Come in, John. How’s Rodney?”
“He’s okay considering. Just had a zone
out, which was…weird.”
“I saw Jack have a zone out once, it was quite
scary. I take it Rodney came out of it alright?”
“It took a while, but yes, Carson and I were able to call him
back from whatever place he went to,” John frowned.
“And as usual, he’s zeroing in on all the negatives
rather
than the positives. He’s pretty freaked out by it
all,
which at least is a normal McKay reaction.”
Elizabeth nodded.
“His natural pessimism’s running high,
then?”
“Oh, yeah, I’d say so. But
he’ll get over it,
I’m sure. I left him in Beckett’s capable
hands,” John smiled at that. “I think we should
tell Teyla
and Ronon about this, and Major Lorne as well. I was
wondering if
we could have a meeting here?”
“That sounds a good idea. Major Lorne has had
experience
with guiding a Sentinel before. He can help explain things to
Teyla and Ronon.”
“Yeah, and help McKay, which could
be…interesting.”
“John,” Elizabeth admonished, “they have
been getting on better these last few months.”
“Mainly because I try to keep them apart as much as
possible. But you’re right, I think Lorne has found
a
greater tolerance, and respect even, for McKay. Of course,
this
is going to stretch that tolerance to its limits.”
“I’m sure it will be alright,” Elizabeth
said, before
asking the gate tech to call Teyla, Ronon and Major Lorne to her office.
They waited for the others to arrive, discussing further
Rodney’s reaction to the situation.
Once everyone was assembled, Elizabeth explained the basics about
Sentinels and Guides, and what had happened to Rodney. Major
Lorne was able to help out with some of the questions from Teyla and
Ronon.
“Major, you have some experience as a temporary
guide,” Elizabeth prompted.
“Yeah, when O’Neill was promoted to General and
took over
the SGC, I stepped in whenever Jackson was off world with
SG-1,”
he sighed. “I’m guessing, ma’am, that
you’d
like me to step in as a temporary guide for Dr McKay?”
“Yes.”
Lorne didn’t quite hide his wince at that.
“If I’m to guide him, then he’s going to
need to
listen to me, otherwise this won’t work.
He’s going
to have to trust me to know what I’m doing,
ma’am.”
“I’ll talk to McKay,” Sheppard said,
“and make
sure that he listens. Just try to go easy on him, this whole
thing’s pretty scary for him.”
“Yes, sir. I’ll do my best.”
“That’s all we can ask,” Elizabeth said
with a smile.
“Dr Beckett believes that Rodney has a Guide here, on
Atlantis?” Teyla asked.
“Yes,” Sheppard replied. “One
that isn’t online yet.”
“What happens when the Guide comes online?”
“A Guide is an empath, someone who can sense the emotions of
others, but not read their thoughts,” Elizabeth explained.
“When bonded, the empathy strengthens, and a limited form of
telepathy also occurs. Outside of a bond, a Guide has a low
level
empathy, and is able to block out the feelings of the people around him
or her. Occasionally the Guide will experience a form of zone
out, when the feelings of the people around him are particularly strong
and he is tired or ill, but it is rare and usually only lasts for a few
minutes at most. A bonded Guide doesn’t suffer from
zone
outs, and the empathy is stronger, but more controlled.
“The telepathy, the ability to send thoughts to another
person’s mind is limited. The Guide can communicate
with
the Sentinel over large distances, somewhere in the region of two to
three hundred miles, depending on circumstances. He or she
can
also communicate via telepathy with a set group of others, over a far
shorter distance of around two to three miles. This set group
of
people, a tribe, or Clan as it is normally referred to, is usually
between five and eight people. Once a person is part of the
Clan,
they remain so until either he or the Guide dies. If the
Guide
outlives a member of the Clan, then he can choose someone to take that
place.”
“A Guide that is bonded can communicate this way with
others?” Ronon asked in clarification.
“Yes. So long as the Guide has chosen
them.”
“Could be useful. As well as knowing if someone is
lying.”
“This is common amongst your people?” Teyla asked
Elizabeth.
“No, not common. I think it’s about one
Sentinel/Guide pair per nine hundred thousand people, or
thereabouts. You haven’t heard about this
before?”
“No,” Teyla said.
“I have,” Ronon stated, “my grandfather
was a
watchman. He had a companion, a brother not of
blood.”
“Hey, maybe that explains your really good
hearing,” John wondered out loud.
“That’s what I’ve always
thought.”
“How will we recognise a Guide who is coming
online?” Teyla asked.
“I’m not sure that we would. The Guide
would be aware
of it, but I doubt we would be, at least not at first. If
someone
suddenly seems to know what everyone is feeling, that would be a dead
giveaway, otherwise…” John trailed off, shrugging
his
shoulders.
“Then we should ask people to be inform us if this happens to
them,” she suggested.
“I don’t think it would be a good idea to let too
many
people know about McKay just yet. He’s going to be
struggling to get a handle on this as it is, without everyone
knowing. He doesn’t need an audience, and he
certainly
doesn’t need the curiosity either,” Sheppard looked
to
Elizabeth. “Can we keep this to as few people as
possible
for now? Just until he’s more comfortable with the
whole
thing himself?”
“Alright. We’ll keep this to as few as
possible, for
the time being. Outside of us, only Radek, Carson and a few
of
Carson’s staff are aware of what is happening with
Rodney.
If you feel you need to tell anyone else, check with me
first. As
for the Guide, there’s no hurry with that.
We’ll keep
an eye out for anyone who appears to be developing empathy, but
otherwise, for now, we’ll just hope that whoever it is will
go to
Carson for help.”
That decision made, the meeting was finished after a few more minor
queries were answered, and Sheppard and Lorne headed down to the
infirmary. Teyla and Ronon would visit later, giving Lorne
time
to talk to Rodney and give him some basic tips first.
----------------
Rodney was in a foul mood. Carson had given him a small
dosage of
Tylenol, which hadn’t made any real impact on his horrendous
headache, and was refusing to give him anymore until he was sure he
wouldn’t react to it, the sadist. Added to that was
the
constant need to watch that he didn’t concentrate on one
sense
too much, as he really didn’t want another zone
out. In
fact, he was trying to ignore his senses, even though they kept
‘spiking’ on him, as Carson put it. It
was beyond
disconcerting to be looking at the ceiling one moment and then for it
to come into focus so that he could see every tiny bump in the
metal. Or for the antiseptic hospital smell to suddenly
become
overwhelming, leaving him gasping. Not to mention all the
other
little tricks his other senses were pulling on him. It was
painful at times, and downright annoying at others.
So when Sheppard returned with Major Lorne in tow, he wasn’t
feeling very charitable towards them.
“McKay, how’re you feeling?” Sheppard
asked in an
overly bright tone. Rodney scowled at him.
“Oh, that
good, then?”
“I feel like crap, and Carson refuses to give me anything but
a
measly bit of Tylenol, which is doing nothing for this
headache.
Oh, and my senses keep spiking, and when they’re not doing
that,
they’re threatening to zone out on me. So
I’m feeling
just… peachy.”
“Well, maybe Lorne here can help with some of that, as our
resident expert on Sentinels.”
“Hardly an expert, sir.”
“If O’Neill thought you were good enough to step in
for
Jackson on occasions, then you must be pretty good at this guiding
thing.”
“I guess so, sir.”
“McKay, listen to the man. He’s got the
experience that will help you to gain control.”
“Fine. Though I’d much rather this whole
senses thing just went away,” Rodney muttered.
“That’s one thing it won’t do,”
Lorne said.
“I know that,” McKay snapped.
“Doesn’t stop me wishing though.”
“Be nice to the kind man with the answers, Rodney,”
John
said with a look that brooked no arguments. Not that the look
worked on McKay very often.
“You try to be nice when your head feels like it’s
splitting open,” Rodney snarled back, this being one of those
many times that Sheppard’s look didn’t work.
“Rodney,” John said warningly.
“You are not
going to step through the stargate until you have reasonable control
over your enhanced senses. Even then, Major Lorne will be
accompanying us on our missions,” he turned to look at Lorne.
“Sorry about that, Major, but I’ll need to assign
you to my
team temporarily.”
“Yes, sir,” Lorne nodded his understanding.
“So, behave. Do what he says. And get
control.
The sooner you do that, the sooner you’ll feel better, and
the
sooner we can go back on missions. Okay?”
“Not okay,” Rodney muttered with a glare,
“but I guess I don’t have much choice, do
I?”
“Nope. Not unless you want to stay in the infirmary
indefinitely.”
“Great,” Rodney said sarcastically.
Lorne approached Rodney’s bed, and sat in the chair next to
it.
“So, your senses are spiking? Describe exactly what
is happening, and I’ll see how I can help.”
“Fine,” Rodney scowled at him.
“I’ll leave you to it…”
Sheppard started to say.
“With respect, sir, I think you need to be here as
well.
The more who know how to help McKay until he finds a Guide, the better
it will be for him. If something was to
happen…”
“Okay, I get the picture.”
Sheppard grabbed another chair and brought it up to McKay’s
bed.
“So, what’s happening with your senses?”
Lorne prompted again.
With a deep sigh, Rodney organised his thoughts.
“Hmm, well, I’ll be looking at something, like the
curtain,” he pointed to the curtain drawn part way around his
bed, “and then I can see every fibre in it, in minute
detail. Or the smells in here will suddenly become too
strong,
and I find it hard to breathe. My hearing will zero in on
something, or someone, without warning. Touch will suddenly
get
bad as well,” he gave a embarrassed laugh. “I just
want to
rip off my clothes, the bed sheets, everything…and then
there’s the times that everything tastes too strong and makes
me
want to throw up.”
“But always one sense at a time, never two or more?”
“Oh crap, you mean they could act up more than one at a
time?” Rodney exclaimed in genuine horror.
“It could happen, but it’s rare. Usually,
only one
sense will spike at a time, occasionally two or three, but not
often,” Lorne reassured, seeing just how freaked out McKay
was at
the thought.
“Oh, good, good. Well, just one at a time, I guess
that
doesn’t seem quite as bad, considering the
alternative…”
“So, how does he stop it happening, Major?”
“Okay. Spikes are usually caused by either a
negative
reaction to something in the environment, something the Sentinel has
eaten, or by an overloading of the area of the brain that controls the
heightened senses. I suspect the latter, as a sudden onset of
heightened senses usually cause problems. Basically, we have
to
wait for that area of the brain to…become used to the new
levels
of input. Though there is something the doc could give you to
help settle things down until then. It’ll take a
day or
two, from what I remember, for it to settle down on its own.
I’ll get the doc in a minute. The Colonel told me
about the
zone out you had. You need to learn to ground yourself to
stop
those happening.”
“How?”
“If you start to concentrate on one sense, you need to add
another one into the mix to avoid a zone out. For example, if
you’re concentrating on hearing, then try to ground yourself
by
seeing what you are hearing, or if that’s not possible, try
touching something rough, or cold. Something that will help
you
to split your concentration between two or more senses.”
“Okay, I can do that.”
“I’ll get the doc, ask him to give you something to
help with the spikes.”
Lorne left to find Beckett.
“See? Not so bad,” John said with a smile.
“Sure. But I have a feeling this is only the start,
and it’s going to get worse before it gets better.”
“Now, don’t be like that, McKay. Positive
thinking…”
“…merely raises hopes to be dashed
later.”
“Ach, I see someone’s in a cheery mood,”
Beckett said
brightly, as he approached Rodney, with Lorne close behind.
“That was quick,” Sheppard said.
“I was on my way to see Rodney anyway,” he said,
preparing
an injection and turning his attention to McKay.
“This will
help stop the sensory spikes until your brain readjusts to
things. Sorry it took so long, but the information I have is
mainly about the genetics of Sentinels and Guides rather than the
treatment of them. Had to wade through a whole heap of data
before getting to anything that’s useful right now.”
“You sure it won’t hurt me? I mean, you
said
something about drug sensitivity,” Rodney watched Carson with
worried eyes.
“This drug is perfectly safe for Sentinels and
it’ll
probably help ease that headache as well. I’ll have
to be
careful with a lot of drugs until I get a new baseline for
you.
In some cases you will need more than normal, in others far
less.
I’ll also have to arrange some allergy tests.”
Carson gave him the injection, ignoring Rodney’s hiss when
the needle went in.
“So, I get to play guinea pig for the mad Scottish doctor for
a while? Wonderful, just… wonderful!”
“Aye, that you do, lad,” Carson teased.
Rodney frowned at him.
“So, this will stop the spikes?” John asked.
“Yes,” Carson answered him.
“Good.”
“I know some exercises that will help you with your
senses,” Lorne started, but was interrupted by Beckett.
“Aye, but that can wait. Let the man get some rest
first.”
“Okay,” Sheppard said, looking to the
Major. “We’ll pick things up
later.”
“Yes, sir,” Lorne said, and walked out, knowing a
dismissal when he heard one.
“You too, Colonel,” Carson ordered.
“Okay, I’ll let you get some rest, McKay.
Teyla and
Ronon will probably be here when you wake up,” John rose from
his
seat, and patted Rodney on the hand briefly. “Get
some
sleep.”
Rodney just sighed heavily, and then nodded reluctantly, closing his
eyes as Sheppard left the infirmary, and Carson went about his
business. Amazingly, he fell asleep within minutes.
----------------
Chapter
Two - Adjusting
The next few days were split between Carson and his tests, and Lorne
and his exercises, with Teyla, Ronon or Sheppard learning about
Rodney’s senses as well. After three days, he no
longer
needed the drug to control the spikes, as they had stopped on their
own, and he was released from the infirmary, with conditions.
He
wasn’t to be alone for any length of time, in case of sensory
spikes caused by unexpected ingested or environmental factors, and also
in case of zone outs, which could last several hours if no one was
around to pull him out.
His team took it in turns to camp out in his quarters at night, and to
baby sit him during the day, though this task was also shared by Lorne
and Radek.
After the sixth day, Rodney had agreed for the news of his Sentinel
status to be shared with people on Atlantis. Fortunately,
most
people had had the sense to leave him pretty much alone, though there
were the inevitable few who looked at him like he was some sort of
freak. They soon changed their attitudes if one of his team
or
Carson, or even Major Lorne, saw the looks, or heard any comments.
The Daedalus wasn’t due back for another two weeks, so
telling
Caldwell would have to wait, and Earth, of course, wouldn’t
know
until the Daedalus returned again. Rodney was actually
grateful
for this delay, secretly worried that he would be recalled to Earth,
for further ‘training’ if not to find a suitable
Guide. He hoped to avoid that, and was grateful that Lorne
knew
as much as he did about Sentinels. Maybe the powers that be
wouldn’t recall him if they were convinced Lorne was capable
of
training him in the use of his senses.
He really didn’t want to leave Atlantis for that long,
especially
as he was working on the intergalactic bridge and really
didn’t
want to leave that in other people’s hands. Sure,
he could
work on the macros on Earth just as easily as on Atlantis, but he
wanted to be involved in finding more gates in the Pegasus Galaxy,
wanted to meet his quota. Okay, so it wasn’t a
competition,
but there was no way he was going to have Carter beat him by filling
her quota before he filled his.
It was now the eighth day since his senses had enhanced themselves, and
he was leaning on the rails of a balcony, looking out over the
ocean. He had stormed out of a Sentinel lesson with Lorne,
and
stalked off on his own, finding a little used balcony to stew on.
He wasn’t surprised when thirty minutes later, Sheppard
walked
onto the balcony, coming to stand beside him, and resting against the
rail as well. Rodney sighed.
“So, Lorne says you had a hissy fit and stormed
out.”
“It wasn’t a hissy fit,” Rodney retorted.
“No? Oh. So, what was it?”
“I had a headache. I wanted to be alone.
And Lorne
wouldn’t quit bugging me about these damn exercises and
tests. So, I left.”
“Uh, uh. You need to learn…”
“Yes, I know that! I just…I just needed
some time to
myself,” Rodney looked at Sheppard.
“I’m still
reeling from this whole ‘now I’m a
Sentinel’
thing. Still trying to come to terms with the fact
I’m some
sort of…freak. Abnormal, at the very
least. And then
there’s everyone pushing me to learn quickly how to control
it
all, and I never have more than a few minutes to myself at any given
time. So forgive me if I couldn’t take it anymore
and
snapped, I think I’m entitled to!”
“You’re not a freak, McKay,” John said
quietly, looking McKay in the eyes.
“Abnormal, then,” Rodney couldn’t keep
eye contact and looked back out to sea.
“Huh, you’ve always been abnormal.”
“Oh, thanks.”
“No, McKay, it’s true. A normal person
wouldn’t
be able to do what you’ve done, wouldn’t be able to
understand half the things you understand,” John nudged his
arm. “You wouldn’t really want to be of
normal
intelligence, would you?”
“Hardly,” Rodney huffed.
“So, you see, you’re already abnormal in one area,
so
what’s the big deal if you are in another as well?”
“I suppose,” though he didn’t sound
mollified.
“Besides, I think of it as being special, rather than
abnormal.”
“Special?” Rodney smiled, perking up a bit,
“I think I can live with being special.”
“Good. And I’ll have a word with Major
Lorne, ask him
to back off a little bit, give you some room, but I’m not
calling
off your babysitters. Not just yet.”
“And how long will I be watched in case of a zone
out? I
can’t live my life like this! I need space, need to
have
time alone.”
“I don’t know how long, but we can’t risk
it,
can’t risk you. A Guide would improve
things. They
can tell if their Sentinel zones out, even when the Guide is miles
away.”
“But I don’t have a Guide, and I’m still
not sold on the whole bonding thing.”
“I know,” John sighed. “Time,
Rodney. In time, it will all work out, I’m
sure.”
“Hmm, be patient, is that what you’re
saying? It’s not one of my better
virtues.”
“Nor mine. You want to try and beat me at
chess?”
“Chess?” Rodney asked, before smiling.
“And
what do you mean, try and beat you? I still have your IOU
from
the last game.”
“Okay, double or nothing?”
They headed off the balcony, Sheppard leading the way to the rec room.
----------------
A game of chess later, and McKay had calmed down enough to reluctantly
agree to a couple of sensory exercises with Major Lorne.
Sheppard
had stayed, acting as referee between the two, as Lorne’s
exasperation with McKay grew. After doing the two exercises,
McKay had headed to his lab, and Sheppard had left him in the care of
Zelenka.
He then went to find Beckett, who was in his own lab.
“Hey, doc, got a minute?”
“Um,” Carson looked up from what he was doing to
see who had interrupted him, and smiled. “Of
course.”
“I…” Sheppard fidgeted, wandering around
the
lab. “I think I might be…
ah…” he
sighed, “…developing empathy.”
“Oh. You think you might be Rodney’s
Guide, then?”
“Ah…yeah…guess so,” he turned
to look at
Carson. “Look, I’ve been getting this
sense of what
people are feeling, and it’s getting more intense.
At first
I just put it down to reading body language, but it’s gone
beyond
that now,” John looked away.
“You’re excited, I
know that, even though you’re trying to seem calm and
professional.”
“Aye, lad, I have to admit to that,” Carson
said.
“It’s bloody exciting, this whole thing, though
also quite
a responsibility for me. I’d better take some
blood, check
your DNA for an activated gene.”
“Exciting for you, maybe. Personally, this whole
thing
is…weird,” John said, as Carson guided him into
the
infirmary, and gathered together the necessary equipment.
“Are you able to control it?”
“No, not yet. It’s like I’ll
suddenly get a
flash of emotion from someone, and then it’s gone.
But the
flashes are getting more often and lasting longer.”
“Ah, you’re probably blocking out
people’s emotions
most of the time, but unconsciously lowering the blocks
occasionally. From what I’ve read about the onset
of
empathy, that’s what happens at the start. After a
few
days, things will start to settle and you’ll find lowering
the
blocks will become entirely a conscious decision, so you’ll
be
able to control it,” Carson took the blood sample whilst
explaining things. “I can give you something to
help
minimise the effects until you gain control.”
“That would be good. It’s freaking me out
a little bit. Just a little bit, mind you.”
“Aye, of course it is. It’d be enough to
freak out
any sane person,” Carson said, and then added with a grin.
“But just a little bit. I’ll check your
DNA and let
you know the results. Once it’s confirmed,
I’ll get
that injection for you, to help settle things down.”
“Thanks, doc.”
----------------
When Carson returned with the results, John wasn’t surprised
to
find out he had an active Sentinel/Guide gene, or to receive an
injection.
“Does anyone else know?” he asked.
“Just myself and you, I ran the tests personally.
I’ll need to inform Elizabeth…”
“Could it wait to a bit? I’d like to talk
to Rodney
first, before anyone else knows. We need to talk, make a
decision, and I’d rather no one else interfered or put any
pressure on us.”
“Well, it’s getting late now. I guess it
can wait until tomorrow morning.”
“Thanks, Carson.”
“Aye, well, you know that you, and Rodney, don’t
have to bond, don’t you?”
“Yes, we know that. We also know that
we’ll function
better if we do bond. I just… we just need to
discuss
things. He might not want this…”
“Do you?” Beckett asked.
“I…” John sighed.
“If you’d have
asked me a few days ago, I would have said ‘no
way’.
The bond is…scary. I know you said it was
platonic, that
it was like being close family, brothers in this case, but it also
involves both of us being aware of the feelings of the other a lot of
the time. I’m not sure either of us could cope with
that
level of…friendship.”
“I’ve seen the two of you together, and believe me,
the two
of you are already bonded as brothers,” Carson shook his head
slightly with a grin. “You certainly argue like
brothers. I’ve seen you in action, not just Rodney
and you,
but the whole team, and I know family when I see it. I know
the
bond will mean admitting to that, at least to Rodney, but
it’s
only admitting to what is already there, the way I see it.”
“Maybe.”
“There’s no maybe about it, lad. But
it’s
something Rodney and you will have to decide for yourselves.
One
thing, if you do decide to bond, you need to wait a few days, give your
body time to adjust to the empathy. Bonding now is liable to
cause a lot of problems that would be avoided if you wait.”
“Okay, whatever we decide, we’ll wait.”
“Good.”
“Thanks, doc.”
Sheppard moved off to find Rodney whilst Carson returned to his
research, hoping that his two stubborn friends could get past the macho
‘men don’t share feelings’ crap and form
the
Sentinel/Guide bond a few days from now.
----------------
Sheppard found Rodney still in his lab, which didn’t surprise
him
any. Ronon had taken over babysitting duties, and was
currently
leaning against a wall looking bored.
“Hey, Ronon, I hear they’re serving your favourite
down in
the mess hall. You want to grab some before it all
goes?”
“Sounds good,” Ronon said, getting the
hint. “See you later, McKay.”
“Hmm, oh, yeah, later,” Rodney looked up from his
laptop, obviously not having heard the conversation.
“So, what you working on?” John asked him.
“Trying to increase power efficiency in some of the
city’s functions.”
“Oh,” Sheppard pushed himself up onto a nearby
table. “Any problems with your senses?”
“Had a zone out a couple of hours ago, but Radek pulled me
out of
it within ten or so minutes. No doubt the tattle tale with
tell
you all about it later,” McKay grumped.
“No doubt, and you know full well that we need to monitor how
often they happen and what sets them off so we can help minimise their
occurrence. It’s for your own good.”
“I know, I know, I just… I feel like I’m
in a fishbowl, and I don’t like it one bit.”
“Yeah, well, you’ll not be the only one
soon.”
“What?”
“Good news, Rodney,” Sheppard announced with false
cheer. “Your Guide has come online.
Carson’s
just confirmed it; I’m an empath.”
Rodney looked stunned, and, for once, was speechless.
“Okay, that wasn’t quite the reaction I had
expected,” John said, smiling ruefully.
“I…you…” Rodney stuttered,
before his brain finally caught up. “You’re a
Guide?”
“Yes, newly come online. Apparently it will take
two or
three days for my brain to adjust to the empathy, and I need to take
some sort of drug until then, a bit like you did. Then,
I’ll gain control, and be able to bond…should we
decide to
do that.”
“Oh.”
“That’s it? Just
‘oh’, nothing else?”
“I…wasn’t expecting this. I
mean, you.
For it to be you,” McKay shook his head in annoyance at his
mixed
up speech. “Okay, so…it’s
you. I suppose
the question is, do you want to bond with me?”
“Do you want me to?”
“I…ah…I…” Rodney
stopped, and then
squared his shoulders, stood and looked John in the eyes.
“Yes,” he said, before looking away nervously.
“But
only if you want to, you don’t have to, we’ll cope
okay
without the bond, and it’s okay if you don’t want
to bond,
I’ll understand; no problem, no big deal, you
know,” he
paced agitatedly. “I mean, the whole sharing each
other’s feelings thing is kind of scary, but I think
it’d
be okay, but if you don’t want that, I’d
understand, really
I would…”
“Rodney,” John interrupted him,
“breathe.”
“Oh, right. Sorry, sorry,” Rodney sat
back
down. “I just, I don’t want you to feel
like you have
to, or anything.”
“To be honest, I’m surprised you would want
this.”
“I know, so am I. I think, if it had been anyone
else, it
would be different. Well, maybe with a couple of
exceptions. Like maybe Teyla, or Ronon perhaps.”
“Family,” Sheppard said quietly.
“That’s what Beckett said about us, the
team.”
“And what you said as well.”
“I did? When?”
“Oh, ah, to Teyla, on the way to Sateda. She, er,
she
thought we should know what you had said. Oh, she’s
so
going to kick my ass when she finds out I’ve let that
slip,” Rodney shuddered.
“Who else has she told?”
“Just Ronon and me. I think she was trying to get
me to
shut up about you shooting me, but to her frustration, it
didn’t
work. You do know I don’t really hold that against
you, I
was just being…”
“A pain in the ass. Yeah, I know.”
“You’re not mad at Teyla, are you? She
was just trying to help.”
“No, no point in being mad at her. She’d
just kick my ass as well,” John grinned.
“She is so going to hurt me…”
“Well, as your Guide, I’ll just have to defend you,
won’t I?”
“As my Guide…you mean, you want to
bond?” Rodney was
surprised. Sheppard nodded with a sigh, looking away from
McKay
and finding the wall very interesting.
“Yeah. Weird, huh? But it
seems…okay.
The right thing to do. Crap, I’m no good at
this. It
just…feels right.”
“It does, doesn’t it?” McKay smiled, and
the snorted. “Oh crap, we sound
like…”
“Brothers.”
“Yeah, brothers,” Rodney smiled.
“Okay, so enough of this sensitive stuff, what say we join
Ronon?”
“Best idea you’ve had
all…year,” Rodney
smirked. John rolled his eyes, resisting the urge to whack
him
upside the head…just.
----------------
Three days had passed since John’s empathy had developed, and
he
no longer required the drug to keep control. He had a better
understanding of how McKay had felt after his Sentinel senses came
online, the feeling of being ‘in a fishbowl’ was
there. Still, he knew people’s curiosity would
settle after
a while, and those who thought he or McKay were freaks were learning to
keep their opinions to themselves at least. He smiled to
himself
when he thought of his team’s protectiveness towards each
other.
Major Lorne was clearly relieved to find out that not only was Sheppard
a Guide, but that Rodney and he were going to form a bond. It
meant that, after some more sessions teaching John how to teach Rodney,
he could pull back and leave them to it, only stepping in when called
on. John couldn’t fault him for that, McKay was not
the
easiest of people to handle at the best of times, and when he was
feeling unsettled, then he could be much worse.
Now, it was time to form the bond, and he had to admit to himself that
he was both terrified and excited at the thought. It went
against
everything he thought about himself, to actually want to let someone
into his life like this. Sure, he might feel about his
friends
here as if they were family, but to admit it…well, Teyla
knew
how hard that was for him. This was more than admitting to
it,
this was opening himself up to someone else, sharing feelings, and
being responsible on a whole other level for said person than
before. He should be running from this, and a part of him
still
wanted to, but he wasn’t. Another part of him
wanted this;
the friendship, the brotherhood, the…caring. It
had to
have something to do with being a Guide, he could only
assume.
And it was probably the same for McKay, another one who had difficulty
with sharing the more ‘sensitive, caring’ emotions
with
people, and yet he also wanted this bond. It must be the
Sentinel/Guide thing, there was no other explanation.
He just hoped they could both handle this change, without becoming
too… emotional… too touchy-feely, even in a
purely
friendship way.
Of course, initiating the bond required some touchy-feely-ness to start
with, but once the bond was formed, there would be no more need to
it. Well, he might need to touch McKay’s arm from
time to
time to ground his senses, or to pull him out of a zone out, but it
wasn’t like they were going to start hugging each other or
anything like that. He wasn’t really that kind of
guy. Okay, it didn’t mean a person wasn’t
manly;
crap, try telling Ronon that hugging Beckett on Sateda wasn’t
manly! No, in certain circumstances it was perfectly fine; he
just wasn’t that sort of person.
He arrived at the balcony, the one Rodney had gone to three days
ago. Nice and secluded, only McKay and himself would be
there. Beckett had wanted to be with them, worried about
possible
problems, but they had insisted that they do this alone. He
knew
Beckett was close by, though, just not close enough to watch or listen.
But ready to come should one of them call him via the headsets.
Rodney wasn’t here yet, but that was okay. He
leaned on the railing, looking seawards, and tried to calm himself.
A couple of minutes later, Rodney came and stood beside him, leaning on
the railing as well.
“So, you still want to go ahead with this?” he
asked nervously.
“Sure. Do you?” John responded.
“Yes.”
“Okay, then. I guess we should, you know, just get
it done with.”
“Okay,” Rodney said, standing up straight and
turning to
face John, who also had stood and turned to face him.
“I
have to admit to being
somewhat…ah…nervous.”
“Same here,” Sheppard said. “In
fact, terrified might be better.”
“Oh good, glad I’m not the only one
then,” Rodney said in obvious relief.
“It will be okay,” John wasn’t sure who
he was reassuring, but suspected it was both of them.
“Okay, then.”
Rodney placed his right hand over John’s heart and his left
hand
on the side of John’s face, his hands shaking with
nerves.
John mirrored him, placing his right hand over Rodney’s heart
and
left hand on Rodney’s face. They both closed their
eyes and
concentrated on the heartbeat under their hands.
John could feel the fingertips on both his hands getting warm, whether
it was from McKay’s body heat or the link starting to grow he
wasn't entirely sure. As he stood there, a tingly feeling started
moving slowly down both his arms. Once it had travelled all
the
way down it felt like a rope, okay, an invisible rope, make that two
ropes in fact, but ropes that were strong and would always link
them. One rope was the telepathic link and the other was
linking
him to the person that was McKay (so he would always know where McKay
was and what he was feeling). Instinctively they both knew
when
the bond felt right and was secure, and it was done.
They were bonded.
They opened their eyes, and stared in wonder for a moment, before
embarrassment took over, and they quickly removed their hands.
“Wow,” McKay said, leaning with his back against
the railing.
“Yeah, wow,” Sheppard agreed.
“That
was…weird, but kinda cool. I can feel you, in
here,”
he pointed to his head.
“Same here. Totally weird…but, yes, cool
too.
It’s not like I thought it would be. It’s
not like I
can feel everything you are feeling, but I am more aware of
you…”
“Yeah. I think I could, if I wanted to. I
could read
your emotions more, but I don’t need to. I just
have this
sense of you.”
“Hey, try out the telepathy,” Rodney turned to him
in excitement.
John concentrated on sending thoughts to Rodney.
‘Can you hear
this?’
“Oh boy. Oh wow. That is…so
cool,” McKay
said excitedly. “I could hear you, in my
mind.
You’d think I’d be freaked out, but it was
so…so…”
“…cool.”
“And you can do that for a chosen few, a Clan,”
McKay snorted. “Sounds a bit Scottish, that.”
“It’s the accepted term. I’ve
been thinking
about that, about who I should make part of our Clan. I was
thinking Teyla and Ronon for sure.”
“Of course. Maybe Carson and Elizabeth?
It could be
useful if you could contact them telepathically too.”
“Yeah, I thought so. We don’t know how
many I can
handle, but four should be okay. I might be able to handle up
to
another four, though I’d rather not.”
“There’s time to think about that.”
“Yeah, there is. Better go find Beckett, tell him
to stop
worrying. Ask him if he’d like to be part of our
Clan.”
“Good idea. Then, can we eat? Because for
some reason I’m suddenly starving…”
“Not just me, then? Must be a side effect of the
bonding. We’ll see Beckett, then hit the mess
hall.”
“Sounds like a plan to me,” Rodney said, his eyes
lighting up at the thought of food.
----------------
Teyla and Ronon were both quite happy to be part of the Clan, as was
Elizabeth when asked. Carson, though feeling somewhat
honoured to
be asked, was less sure about it. However, with some gentle
encouragement from Elizabeth, and not so gentle goading from Rodney, he
agreed.
The actual forming of the telepathic bond was much less embarrassing
for John than the forming the Sentinel/Guide bond had been, entailing
him to place one hand on the side of the face of each person in turn,
but no more touchy-feely stuff than that, to his immense relief.
Now that Rodney had a Guide, it was felt that Major Lorne was not
needed to go on missions with them, and that he could return to his
former duties and team, for which he was extremely thankful.
After testing the telepathy out, and several days of adjusting to the
Sentinel/Guide bond, the team were ready to head through the stargate
again.
The End
