Word Count:
656
Rating:
PG.
Category:
Humour. Friendship.
Story Status:
Complete
Summary:
Set sometime in Season 3 or early Season 4. Rodney's POV
about Ronon's annoying off world habit.
Beta:
Thank you to Jayne Perry for the beta-reading.
Ronon’s Raids
By Leesa Perrie
The main problem, as far as Rodney was concerned, with Ronon not
wearing an Atlantis uniform or tac vest off world was the lack of
storage; not having much in the way of pockets. Where Ronon
kept
his hidden knives, Rodney still didn’t entirely know, and
wasn’t sure he wanted to either.
So, a lack of pockets meant a lack of storage which meant, for some
inexplicable reason, the need to raid the back packs and/or tac vests
of his team-mates for food. Well, one team-mate in
particular. Him, Rodney McKay, genius scientist and,
apparently,
a walking, talking food store.
He wouldn’t mind it quite so much if Ronon did it to the
others
too, but no, it was always Rodney’s pack or vest that was
raided. Usually when he wasn’t looking, having put
said
pack or vest down for some reason or other.
Not always though. Ronon wasn’t adverse to slipping
a hand
into Rodney’s back pack while he was still wearing
it…though fortunately Ronon hadn’t resorted to
patting
down Rodney’s tac vest as well while he was wearing it; that
would have been extremely disconcerting and uncomfortable –
personal space and all that.
And what was Ronon’s response to his complaints? A
smile at
the most, as the caveman tucked into whatever delight he’d
managed to steal.
His team-mates were no help whatsoever, finding it amusing.
Right, when he collapsed from hypoglycaemia because all his food was
gone, they wouldn’t find it so amusing then, now would they?
Not that he ever had. Collapsed, that is. Sheppard
or Teyla
always seemed to have spare food on them… Hmm, now that he
thought about it, they only ever seemed to have extra food on them when
Ronon was off world as well. The few times it had been just
himself and Sheppard, or Teyla, they never seemed to carry more than
they themselves needed.
Great. They were pandering to Ronon’s
amusement.
So now, he was Rodney McKay, genius scientist, walking, talking food
store and team entertainment.
Of course, the fact that he had started to carry more food himself when
Ronon was off world with him had nothing to do with feeding the
behemoth, and everything to do with making sure he didn’t run
out.
Of course it was.
His ruminations were interrupted by a less than stealthy –
and he
knew for a fact that Ronon could be a lot more stealthy if he wanted to
– hand reaching into the pack on his back.
“Hey,” he said indignantly, pulling away from his
thieving
team-mate, to see said team-mate with a PowerBar already unwrapped and
with a bite taken out of it. Damn, he was quick.
“Oh,
that’s great. Just take my food, why
don’t you?”
“Thanks, I will.” Ronon
grinned. Actually had the gall to grin at him.
“That’s not what I meant, you overgrown
Ewok! I’m the one with the medical
condition…”
“We’ll be back at the gate within an hour, McKay,
I’m
sure you’ll be fine until then,” Sheppard
interrupted, not
hiding the grin on his face.
“That’s not the point! What if we run
into trouble or get kidnapped or…”
“Would you like one of my PowerBars?” Teyla asked
serenely.
“What? No, no, not right now. But if we
get delayed I will. Nice to know at least someone is
concerned about my well being,” he huffed in agitation.
“You’ll be fine,” Ronon said around
another mouthful.
“And you should carry your own food,” he grumped,
before
falling into silence once more, concentrating on not stumbling over
rocks or into potholes on this poor excuse for a road.
And it seemed, he thought to himself wryly, that he was Rodney McKay,
genius scientist, walking, talking food store, team
entertainment…and total fraud. He didn’t
really mind
Ronon’s off world raids that much any more. In a
way it was
almost comforting, familiar...like family.
Not that he was ever going to admit it, of course.
The End
Author's Notes:
In April in the comment section
on Joe Mallozzi’s blog,
o6untouchable asked a few Ronon related
questions. The one below is what sparked the above ficlet:
“Ronon looks
awesome when he
goes off world, but I can’t help but notice the absence of
pockets. He doesn’t wear a Tac Vest either; does he have to
raid
Rodney’s uniform for snacks while off world, or does he have
some
concealed storage?”
I hope that if o6untouchable reads
this, he/she will be proud to have given me the idea …but
somehow I doubt it. More like embarrassed, I suspect! * grins
sheepishly* Sorry 06untouchable!!
Also, I asked by beta, Jayne Perry,
for an animal/creature for the ‘overgrown’ insult
as I
couldn’t think of a one that felt right for Rodney to
use…and she brilliantly suggested ‘overgrown
Ewok’! Love ya, Jayne, that’s just so
perfect!
