Rodney
McKay and the Evil Whumping Girls of Doom
Photos and story by Leesa Perrie and Jayne
Perry
Part Three
The aliens give up on the torturing idea when Rodney refuses to shut
up
about anything and everything except what they want to know.
They move him to
another part of their spaceship, which is still on the planet not in
space. ("You should have mentioned that earlier," whispers Evil
Whumping
Girl #2. "Shush!" replies Evil Whumping Girl #1. "No one will notice!")
Much to Rodney's relief, his team arrive and stun the aliens before
anything more hideous occurs.
"What took you so long?" he snaps.
"Great to see you too, McKay," John replies dryly.
But before McKay is able to reply, a Wraith appears from nowhere,
aiming his stunner at them.
("What's happened to the stunned aliens," asks Evil Whumping Girl #2.
"Um, I dunno, they were, er, beamed out?")
The Wraith immediately takes Rodney hostage.
"Oh great, why me? Why did you have to pick
on me?"
"Because you have no weapon."
"Oh. Right."
The Wraith was about to make his demands, but to everyone's shocked
surprise, Elizabeth comes to their rescue!
"Elizabeth! What are you doing here?" asks Rodney. "Not that we're not
happy to see you, what with the rescue and all that, but..."
"I believe what Rodney is trying to say is 'thank you'," Teyla
interrupts. "Though we are surprised to see you here."
"I realised that I had jinxed you in true fanon style by saying 'good
luck' and 'be safe', so thought I'd better follow you and undo the mess
my words caused," Elizabeth replied.
"You came alone?" Sheppard says. "Just wait 'til I get back,
Lorne is in sooo
much trouble..."
"He doesn't know I followed you, John."
"Whatever," Rodney interrupts. "Can we go home now?"
"Yeah," Ronon agrees.
Keller gives them a post mission check-up, keeping Rodney in the
infirmary for monitoring after his terrible, awful, so bad he can't
possibly talk of it torturing ordeal.
Later that day, Sheppard is back in the infirmary with an owie a
broken leg.
("Gotta keep the Shep-whumpers happy," says Evil Whumping Girl #1 with
a grin.)
"How'd you break your leg, Sheppard?"
"I was doing... something heroic and daring," Sheppard says,
hoping McKay will leave it at that. Of course, he should have
known better.
"Oh, and what was this heroic and daring thing you did?"
"He made this dangerous and ill-advised skateboarding jump," comes the
gleeful disembodied voices of Evil Whumping Girls #1 and #2.
Sheppard groans and blushes in embarrassment as McKay laughs.
He'll never hear the end of this now.
THE END
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